We were in Whole Foods. Mr. P was harvesting oysters, while I picked some kale. A woman and a man shuffled past me, canvasing the expansive produce section with neutral expressions. Definitely, these were MWEs (Meat with Eyes.)
“What do you want this week?” the woman asked. “Peppers? Lettuce?”
“Oh, you know, the yush,” the man brayed. The ‘yush,’ as in ‘usual.’ Might also be spelled ‘yuge.’ Kinda rhymes with ‘douche.’ I rolled my third eye and wandered to the onion display.
Apparently onions are part of yush, because the MWEs appeared behind me. “How many onions do think we should get?” the woman asked. Dear me, is this woman capable of making a grocery-related decision without consulting the douche?
“Oh, you know, it depends if we fire up some fajitas this week,” the man said, and then inexplicably added, “Pow! Pow!”
I decided that this man was possibly the most annoying man ever and fled to the safety of the Chinese vegetable section. And that’s why we ate bok choy tonight.
