Conventional wisdom holds that our most venerable higher education institutions are immune from economic downturns, because even the most impoverished financial magnate, industry titan, or political power broker can pony up (or Ponzi up) a few hundred thousand dollars to send Junior to the Ivy League.
But it turns out that the financial crisis has humbled even Harvard University, which may lose over 30 percent of its $36 billion endowment by June 2009. Since Harvard derives about 1/3 of its operating income from its endowment, the university is forced to shore up some more cash. Aside from the token layoffs, pay freezes, and tuition increases that will hit most other private colleges, Harvard is reconsidering its expansion in the Allston neighborhood.
This reversal of fortune comes after years of buying up chunks of Allston real estate, often secretly and without community input, in pursuit of a grandiose 50-year plan that involved basically devouring Allston. Harvard won over outraged Allstonians with a flurry enticing amenities like bike paths, cafes, boutiques, theaters, and gardens.
But last week Harvard announced that the university has halted construction work on the science complex due to the economic crisis, leaving Allston blighted with empty property and in doubt about their neighborhood’s future. Residents are suddenly desperate for Harvard to come to town with the promised public art installations and spraying fountains.
It’s tempting to smirk about Harvard’s financial woes, but I really only pray for the miraculous recovery of their ridiculous endowment. I miss the sense of security that living down the road from Harvard confers. I always reasoned that even if my career imploded and my professional prospects dimmed, I could always show up at the Harvard employment office and get a job, say, as a silver-ware polisher in the dining services, or as a chambermaid in the dormitories.
Incidentally, during his stand-up act last Saturday, Norm MacDonald mentioned that he used to be intimidated when he worked with Harvard alumni on comedy shows, but then he realized that most of them weren’t smart, they were just rich. “If I was born stinking rich and I never had to do any work and I still had all this money, I’d think I was pretty fucking smart, too.” So now, maybe Harvard’s feeling about 30 percent less smart.
