The MBTA has launched a new program to entice more people to ride buses. But who needs vehicle or service improvements when there’s already this great bus system just sitting there, undiscovered. People just need to be encouraged to give it a try with innovations like… “new maps, schedules, and signs at 10 stations pointing out bus stops.” Maps, schedules (!) and signs… who’s the renegade thinker at the MBTA?
My history with the MBTA bus system is not very storied. I’ve taken several bus lines semi-regularly, but I never let my commute depend on a bus, for the simple reason that taking an MBTA bus is the most stressful form of transportation I’ve every experienced. The typical MBTA bus ride consists of standing in an aisle and being inadvertently molested ever time the bus suddenly breaks, surrounded by screaming groups of teenagers and smelly homeless men, at the mercy of a road-rage-prone driver who valiantly tries to stay on schedule despite non-yielding, rush-hour traffic. It’s a Third World experience. It’s worse than driving, worse than flying, worse than taking an Amtrak regional train. The only faster way to a heart attack is a steadfast diet of canned coup, cigarettes, and Crisco.
